Friday, April 3, 2009

~Georgie and I~


This is a very old and a bit discolored picture of Georgie and I. It hangs on my wall and it has since my parents died. Sometimes events happen that are life changing. They often make us who we are. This was one of those events in my life.
I was about four when he was born, January 3rd 1942, I think. It was just after Christmas, and it was during the depression and WWII was going on.
Times were terrible and there was no work. My father walked the streets and took any job he could find as many men did in those times. My mother became pregnant with Georgie during this time and couldn't work. They struggled and when Georgie was two my father went into the service, but Japan surrendered and Daddy didn't have to go to war. When Georgie was born he was brought home to a tiny little motel room. Daddy finally found work and they found a sweet little cottage on a shady street in a quiet neighborhood and life became like a Fairytale for me. We were happy. My parents were beautiful and happy people.


This was my mother. Her name was Lillian.


This was my father. His name was Raymond but everyone called him Ray.

Georgie was about two and a half and I was about 6 years when tradgedy struck our little family. Both of my parents were working in the ship yards in Portland Oregon during this time and my little brother and I stayed with a wonderful neighbor across the street in our neighborhood. One day my mother fell off a scaffolding onto a pile of sheet metal and broke her shoulder, her arm, her ribs. There was even damage to her teeth. They said it was a miracle that she didn't die. She finally left the hospital and we went to pick her up. She was in a body cast. On the way home they stopped and bought groceries, then continued toward home stopping for gas along the way where they had some friends.
When my mother got out of the car, Georgie began to cry. He had gotten into the bag of groceries and was eating a peanut cluster and he began to choke. My father grabbed him, pounded his back and finlly turned Georgie up side down and shook him..beginning to panic as the baby turned blue...and suddenly Georgie began to breath. Today we know not to do that..but in the 40's the Himelick Maneuver was not known. They calmed him...but when he breathed he whistled. They rushed him to nearby doctor. I still remember the Doctor's name. It was Dr. Poacher. He said my brother was fine and not to worry that they were over reacting. I remember while my parents were in the doctors office I entertained myself walking along the top of a short retaining wall trying to balance myself and not fall off. Finally they came out and we went home. I remember they rushed him to the hospital when he fell and couldn't get up..but..it is a vague memory. It was a terrifying time. At the hospital they told my parents that Georgie had a peanut lodged in his little lung and that it would have to be removed surgically. We waited downstair...a long,long time. We were all very quiet.
I remember there were long winding stairs and the floor at the bottom was marble..
Two doctors came walking down the stairs to my parents...my mother was wearing a camel colored coat that tied in the front. Her hair was rolled on the sides and it was glossy and beautiful. As they came near the bottom of the stairs my mother just looked at them..I remember one of them saying something and my mother began to scream "Oh my God Raymond, NO, NO, NO, NO...over and over and over..I don't remember anything after that. They had lost my baby brother on the operating room table.
My next memory is of my father taking me in the car. I'm not sure why but I think they thought it was the thing to do. They took me to see Georgie in his tiny casket. I remember looking at him and turning to say "Daddy, he looks like he is sleeping"...and that is all I remember. My father picked me up and took me out of there. We were both crying. I was six. I am now 72 and I cry as I write this story. I didn't go to school for a long time. I think perhaps it was for lots of reasons. Maybe I was too upset..but I think it was because of my Mother. I think she wanted me near her. I would hear her crying in the night. Deep wracking sobs that shook my very soul.. and I can hear that sound to this day when the memory comes back to me. My parents were never the same. They were never young and carefree again. I no longer came home from school to find my beautiful mother dancing around the kitchen to the radio and the tunes of the 40's. The lilt went out of her laughter. My father became quiet. Sadness was etched in his young face and he was never the same either.

I know this is not the most uplifting post...but...sometimes we have to write what we have to write...and I needed to write about this tonight.
I believe I will see Georgie one day soon. And all of my relatives and friends and that passed over. I believe in life after death. No one can tell me different. It is just something I know deep inside. There are things in my life that have happened so that I know this to be true. It is my belief that Georgie is my guardian angel and he watches over me and mine. As I get older I have many.

G'night..love and hugs,
Mona

24 comments:

  1. Oh Mona what a sad story. I'm so sorry you had to live through this. How hard for your mother to be in a body cast and then have to go through losing her child. What an awful time that had to have been.

    I understand what you mean by your life changed then.

    When I was 11 my brother who was 18years old was killed in a car accident. My mother was never the same after that. She never got over that loss.

    Three months later my dad died. I learned at an early age that life can be over in a flash.

    I too believe with all my heart that I will see my family again one day. I think that is why I have no fear of dying. I miss them very much. I have about 1/2 my family here with me and 1/2 in Heaven waiting.

    Who knows, maybe my family is up there with your families visiting as we do down here.
    Big hugs,
    Joanne

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  2. What a tragedy, to lose a child is something I cannot fathom. Your parents were obviously devastated and, of course, you had no idea how to cope at such a young, impressionable age.

    You are lucky to have little Georgie as your guardian angel, knowing that you will be reunited with him one day.

    Hugs,
    Jane

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  3. i am quite sure that George is happy that he was remembered this way.

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  4. i'm crying too hard to write right now, mona....

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  5. Oh, what a sad, sad event in a young child's life, not only to lose a baby brother but her fun-loving parents, too. My heart goes out to you, Mona.

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  6. Atleast we know that there are no tears in heaven. I think your mother is dancing and singing now. What a sad and terrible time for your family when you lost your little brother. You will see all of them again and you'll all be happy to be reunited.
    Hugs, Susan

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  7. Joanne made me think of something my best friend and I always say about our mothers. They were very much alike and though they never met we always think our mothers are hanging out together and watching out for us. I know my mother has helped me out a few times.
    Susan

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  8. This was a sad story, but as You say sometimes one have to write what one have to write.

    To lose ones child must be one of the worst thing that can happen to You. Can´t understand how one can get through something like that.

    Ofcourse there´s life after death, that is something I truly belive.
    Christer.

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  9. Mona,
    I just love the pictures of you & Georgie and also of your parents by the car. They look so young and carefree then. As I read your post I got very choked up to think they had to go through so much heartbreak all at once. I can imagine it was very difficult and sad for you to hear your mother sobbing in the night. My heart goes out to you.

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  10. Oh yes you will see him again. Life is so sad sometimes. But one day soon we will not be sad anymore.

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  11. I too lost a brother when I was 9. He was 11 and Hodgkins Lymphoma took him. I have a post about it somewhere and how it affected my parents.... Mom was always strange towards the rest of us after that.

    DI
    The Blue Ridge Gal

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  12. Dear Mona,
    I can't imagine what you and your poor family went through. My eyes filled with tears. Time doesn't always heal all wounds. I'm sorry, sweet Mona.
    Patricia

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  13. Mona,

    What a life you have had! And what great spirit and courage you display.
    Thank you for sharing this poignant story with us.

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  14. Thank you everyone for your sweet comments... I am very aware that we have all had some enormous pain. There is nothing as painful as losing a child. From birth to whenever...it is unbearable. Losing a precious husband or wife or any relative is horrible...but a child is beyond description!! I think of our sweet Becky...and what she is going through.
    Love and hugs to all of you..
    Mona

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  15. Oh, dearest Mona! I'm crying as I'm reading your post! What a horrible tragedy! Your poor parents and you - so young you really didn't understand! Oh, Dear One, yes, I know this life is not all there is! Heaven is just a heart beat away. I have two babies there, both whom I never saw. My daddy is there and my grandparents and many more. We have the promise through Jesus Christ that we'll see our loved ones again.
    You'll be in my prayers tonight, Dear One, that God will comfort you!
    Blessings,
    Shelia ;)

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  16. Dear Mona, that was a very touching story. Times were different then, and we are grateful for living in these times of medical wonders. But thank you for telling all of us about your memories - and have a good week, you are in my prayers!
    xxxooo
    Marilyn

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  17. Mona, what a sad story. It must have been so difficult for your parents. We never know what some people have had to bear. I am once again reminded how fast life can change. THank you for the get well wishes. Hugs, Kathleen

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  18. Mona,
    This is such a sad story and I'm sorry for the loss your family had with losing Georgie. God never promised us life on earth would be without pain, but there is the promise of everlasting life with Him. Hugs to you, Nancy

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  19. Mona,

    I was so saddened by your story about the loss of your brother, Georgie. What a traumatic childhood memory and what a profound loss your parents experienced. I believe you are right that burying a child is something that a parent can never get over. It changes you.

    In 1993, my grandmother died at the age of 88 while visiting my mother. Incredibly, she died after having just buried her son (my mother's brother/my uncle)not even one week earlier.

    I will never forget my uncle's funeral. My grandmother was inconsolable. This was her 2nd son to bury and even though he was a 68-year old man, she just kept crying about how wrong it was for her sons to be dying before her.

    After the funeral, my mother insisted on bringing my grandma back to St. Louis from Detroit as she sensed that something just wasn't right. A few days later my grandmother was gone from heart failure. I truly believe it was from a broken heart.

    Ironically, she died at my mother's house...her only daughter and youngest child of six!

    Blessings to you Mona,
    Valerie

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  20. Sweet Mona, this story just touched me to the core. It makes me breath hard and have a heavy heart. I know what it is like to lose a child - you already know this. A dear friend of mine lost her son at age 8. She and her husband were never the same and to this day grieve over their loss. As parents, we never stop loving our children. Never..ever..ever. I know that Georgie is your guardian angel as Jordan is ours. Your poor parents. Rest assured your little brother is in Heaven. He is rejoicing in the love of our Lord, as is my son. Can you imagine the joy they are having and no pain, no angst, no worries. I cannot wait to join them. In time. Someday. That day will be the very best I have ever known!! I know you must feel the same way. God Bless You!!

    Many hugs and love to you,
    Becky

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  21. Oh Mona, what a horrible tragedy to have to go thru as such a young girl. My heart goes out to you as I know you still feel the pain of losing him even today. You are right, of course. All our writing can't be happy. Keep writing, my friend. You have a gift.

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  22. Mona...I will never understand why things like this happen in this world. I am sooo sad for your Mom and Dad and for you. No one should ever have to feel that kind of pain...ever! I know you were the light in your parents life. I pray that you will all be united one day and all the pain that you and your parents felt will completely vanish without a trace. Love to you, Susan

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  23. I too lost a little brother before he was even out of the crib. It stays with you but you go on in their memory of what they could've been. Thank you for sharing your story.

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  24. Such a moving event, Mona. When I read of the tragedies that some people have endured in their lives, it reminds me to be oh so thankful for the lack of tragedies in mine. We did lose my father 2 years ago to a massive stroke and he was only 67, so vibrant and full of health and ACTIVE. But I am thankful for the 67 years he had, and I know if he would have recovered from this stroke to live out his days in a nursing home, well, he would not have liked us so much for that!!

    You seem to have weathered these tragedies so well - in spite of losing your brother at such a young age, and effectively losing your parents as well as it changed their whole demeanor and outlook on life -- well, I'm inspired by your cheerful outlook on life! But what can we do, eh? We must go on, and in honor of those before us, we must live life with zest! :)

    Hugs~
    Susan

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Thank you SO much for sharing your thoughts! Your comments are very important to me.