I have the sweetest neighbor that lives across the street from me. I consider myself lucky to have her. She is a great deal younger than I am and has a little six year old girl. Her husband works out of town and is gone for a week at a time. I have known the family for about a year now.
My friend comes over nearly every day. She is lonely I think. Her family lives near by and I also know her family. Very nice people and close knit.
She has a little girl that is just adorable. From the first day they came to visit it was difficult to carry on a conversation with her mother. She would stand between her mother and I and demand attention. Not knowing them I just did the best I could to hear what the mother was saying as the little girl talked OVER her mother non stop.
I gave the child my attention as much as possible, reading her stories, playing with her etc. I have dolls and many childrens toys, such as play dishes...etc.
Even giving her lots of time new things to interest her..nothing worked. She talks non stop from the time they arrive until the time they finally leave. I say "finally" because it become very wearing.
The little girl was a premature baby and the mother is in her 30's with no intention of having more children. Not that I blame her as this cute little girl is a handful.
It's been a year now and nothing has changed. The mom just has difficult time disciplining her at all.
Here is the worst part.
The child is often insulting! Not just to her mother but to me as well! She speaks more like an adult then a little girl. I have seen other children in my life that were somewhat like this one...but not this bad by a long shot.
Recently I have begun speaking up. When she begins to get mean I attempt to stop her.
I tell her "that's not a bit nice!" or some such thing. It seldom has any impact.
I have even, of late, given her little talks such as "you are so cute and I love you. But..I want you to be as sweet as you look..." or some such thing.
Here's another thing. She seems to be easily distressed at times and gets a very hurt look on her face and it's sincere. So I back off and just let her go on...and on...and on.
I know her mother adores her...and doesn't want to upset her either. That's obvious.
Now and then the mom will say "STOP!" but in a few seconds it starts all over.
I have begun to...and I hate to say this...find reason to get back inside the house to work after just a few minutes of a visit.
It makes me feel bad. I mean REALLY bad because I love the little girl AND her mother.
I have even told my friend in a laughing way that "I think God knew what he was doing when he gave children to the very young."
We have even talked about how the constant adult type insults and such get to the mother badly at times.
She says she talks to her about it. Tries to get the little girl to understand. Nothing works!Q!
It's the hands on hips, squinting eyes, sassy back talk that finally gets to me.
I do not want to lose the friendship...and I keep thinking she will outgrow it..as she is now going on seven. But nothing changes, only seems to get worse.
My question...how would you handle it. I feel so bad when I make excuses to disappear.
There have been times I don't answer the door!! That's NOT me!
Thanks for listening.
Love and hugs,